Notes to myself..

1. All the good ones are taken, cling to whatever you have!
2. Ignorance is bliss – try not to find out, not to know and lie down lazy
3. Beware of spontaneous human combustion
4. Stop incentivizing yourself for all the small things you accomplish
5. Follow your month-long time table for at least a day
6. Watching Seinfeld 8 times a day will not get you anywhere, Also in the end you will have no episodes left! Looks like it’s a road to perdition Think and stop right now..
7. You are a MSc chemie + 7 pointer and not Mark Shuttleworth
8. Mouli is still to treat you.
9. Get the tubelight fixed and hence create a mentally stimulating environment
10. Ask yourself, is it Tuesday yet? If no, find when is it coming? After Monday? If yes, do what you were supposed to do, do what everyone does on Tuesdays!
11. Dude, above all you should stop blogging and prepare for placements, else you will blog your entire life…Stop this here at once and get back to important things.

yeah :P

We chat online a lot everyday and while doing so we sometimes come across some new words, phrases or analogies we are unaware of(say from a movie you haven’t seen or something like that) etc. We don’t quite know what the other person is trying to convey! But suppose the other person is someone whom you cannot ask for explanation for whatever reasons — self pride and reputation mainly being the reasons — you try to sometimes google or ask some other friend or just try to skip that part. Sometimes the other person(is so smart) actually finds out you have no clue and there you go! Back to square one with less reputation, permanently.

Now here’s a simple way out. Just say – “yeah ” in such cases.

Case 1: Suppose the other person said something which actually meant – “Go, remove your clothes and run naked in your hostel”. As you have no clue as to what the other person just said – you just reply back – yeah Now in this case, definitely he will take it you got it and you are trying to be sarcastic or funny by agreeing to it.

Case 2: Suppose the other person is a girl your are checking out and what she said meant – “Lets make out!” Well now as you are completely dumb and you didn’t get what she meant, you might be losing an opportunity or worse losing her(yeah because she thinks you are dumb) forever. Well, the wise thing to do here is to utter those 6 characters yeah Also depending on the mood of conversation(hope you know what’s going on else gimme her number and you sit back and read my blog) use the correct smiley…Maybe if the discussion going on is not so funny use instead of

It is very crucial here to understand the role smileys play, specially “:P” – it adds a negative effect to yes and you mean both “yes” and “no” at the same time, giving the handle back to the other person who involuntarily makes a choice for you.

PS: Whoever you are, whatever you do, Please don’t try this offline
PS2: Yes, I have used this myself some times.
PS3: Well if you are really curious as to what the other person meant, go ahead be honest, ask what it means and never read my blog again..

X and 0

X = yes
0 = no!

[X] got high
[X] been called sexy
[0] stole money
[X] slept beside a boy
[0] had sex
[0] been in a relationship for more than 8 months
[0] taken a topless picture in the mirror
[0] made out with a member of the same sex
[0] stolen a car
[X] skipped school
[0] slept with a co-worker
[0] slept with more than 15 people
[X] been called a slut bitch or hoe
[0] had a one night stand
[X] seen a dead person
[0] shoplifted
[0] been fired
[X] gotten the chicken pox
[X] been in a fist fight
[X] snuck out of your parent’s house
[X] had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back
[0] been arrested
[0] gone on a blind date
[X] had a crush on a teacher
[0] been to U.S.A
[0] been to Mexico
[0] thrown up in a bar
[0] purposely set a part of yourself on fire
[0] been snowboarding
[0] went to a concert
[0] gone to a therapist
[0] taken sleeping pills
[X] laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
[X] been obsessed with post-it notes
[X] squished barefoot through the mud
[X] been lost
[0] hitch hiked
[0] been to the opposite side of the country
[0] swam in the ocean
[X] felt like dying
[X] cried yourself to sleep
[0] hacked into someones msn
[X] played cops and robbers
[0] recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers
[0] paid for a meal with only coins
[X] done something you told yourself you wouldn’t do
[X] made prank phone calls
[0] laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
[0] caught a snowflake on your tongue
[X] danced in the rain
[X] done something to see how people react
[0] written a letter to Santa Claus
[0] been kissed under a mistletoe
[0] watched the sun rise with someone you care about
[X] blown bubbles
[0] made a bonfire on the beach
[X] been to a party
[X] gone roller skating
[X] had a wish come true
[0] humped a monkey
[0] worn pearls
[0] jumped off a bridge
[0] screamed “penis” in public
[X] ate dog/cat food
[0] told a complete stranger you love them
[0] kissed a mirror
[X] sang in the shower
[X] had a dream that you married someone
[0] glued your hand to something
[0] got your tongue stuck to a flag pole in winter
[0] kissed a frog
[0] worn the opposite sexes clothes
[0] been a cheerleader
[X] sat on a roof top
[X] screamed at the top of your lungs
[X] done a one-handed cartwheel
[0] talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
[X] stayed up all night
[0] picked and ate an apple
[X] climbed a tree
[0] had a tree house
[X] been scared to watch scary movies alone
[X] believed in ghosts
[0] have more then 30 pairs of shoes
[0] worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say
[0] gone streaking
[X] played knock-knock-ginger
[X] been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
[0] been told you’re hot by a complete stranger
[0] broken a bone
[0] caught a fish then ate it (after it was cooked, lmao.)
[0] caught a butterfly
[X] laughed so hard you cried
[X] cried so hard you laughed
[0] flashed someone
[0] had someone moon/flash you
[X] cheated on a test
[0] had a Britney Spears CD
[X] forgotten someone’s name
[X] slept naked
[X] kicked a guy where it hurts
[X] gotten lost in your city
[0] gone out in public in your pajamas
[0] pushed all the buttons on an elevator
[0] cheated on someone
[0] have a boyfriend right now

PS: I am a pretty lame personality

todo list!

A glimpse from amongst the thousands of things, randomly chosen using the Mersenne Twister random number generator algorithm. Phew!

1. Win two nobel prizes in economics back-to-back
2. Dominate Earth
3. Have banana milkshake
4. Watch a movie alone in a theater
5. Visit Las Vegas and participate in WSOP
6. Learn tennis and win against Federer fans
7. Make 160 palladins in 40 minutes…Contact me for the recorded game
8. Go on a date with a not-so-good-looking-ugly-intellectual-blabbermouth girl and actually listen to what she’s saying while dining(if dining or doing whatever)
9. Compose a song
10. Create the Indian south park
11. Get a job
12. Have a bath
13. Climb up a coconut tree
14. Get interviewed by any non-DNA newspaper
15. Direct and write a movie and atleast get nominated for the oscars
16. Have Thai food
17. Steal speakers from room no. 238
18. Be a billionaire
19. Learn driving
20. Sue Zubin Mehta for name infringement
21. Become spiderman(yeah all the batman fans, its easier to be a batman but difficult to find the correct radioactive spider…i like challenges)
22. Have a team of around 50 and go beg at the marine drive and have burgers with the money you earned there…..huh…who are all in??
23. Read Maximum city
24. Profess a self-made religion(will most likely be named Tuzuism)
25. Go bird-watching in the woods
26. Go bird-watching to Chandigarh
27. Build a device for assisting reading at night!(It will be a stand kind of a thing with book holder and a small bulb with adjustable distance and many more facilities worth your money Launching soon..
28. Hack into the iitb asc system and change my grades
29. Get a job!….ohh God, is it so seriously up there in my brains..
30. Buy new Jeans
31. Tell 5 girls, i “love” them
32. Decide which one’s better, South park or Big bang theory
33. Be an otologist, paleo-anthropologist, pharyngologist and lastly an eschatologist
34. Laugh at some unknown person for no reason
35. Eradicate mosquitos
36. Spell “mosquitoes” correctly
37. Write a blog post on 17th May 2009

Taking modulus of your emotions!

I came across this thought, as to how different the world would be if all we felt was the modulus of our feelings(Thanks to Goyal). Suppose you are a mediocre in some field. Well getting back to Goyal, some days back he received a FR(fail and repeat) grade in some course and obviously its a matter of depression for most sane people and the ones who don’t give reasons. Some days later, he gets AA in a project which was not at all expected and we had a good laugh.

Both incidents were equally intense on the emotion scale but with opposite signs(though we remain sad more than happy…come on we are less satisfied…we the modern era people…we want too much..) So what if whatever the feeling be we just feel the modulus of it. We always feel happy whatever the situation be! Hence will we love to super sad or have really bad blows, have rejections? Will there be people who would want to stay near zero or you doubt such people will exist? I mean people either want to be very happy and satisfied as we are now but things are weird and good on the sad side too…! Will people want to be sad?

Will the discontinuity at zero matter?

PS: I could have complicated the theory by taking it to n-dimensions rather than just talking about the Argand plane as here!

47

Since past few days, there is something abnormal going on around with me. Well since past 2 – 3 weeks I am seeing 47 everywhere. Initially I thought it was just some random thing happening but now its just too much. Well, initially whenever I looked at the time it was either 12:47, 2:47, 3:47, 6:47….whatever..but only 47! I thought it was just my mind which always wanted to see the time at the 47th minute of the hour. But it wasn’t only the time…the number and variety of incidents increased. I happened to go to Juhu for some TF job treat and on the way I saw two cars back to back with numbers 4575 and 4676. Now it might sound a bit too much but yes …its 47 everywhere.. :0

Then one day I told these incidents to Ramdas and on listening he said he was AIR 47…huh..My room number 247. I was at home and went down for a bit to buy some stuff and a BEST bus passes no 247. I posted something on facebook and it said posted at 6:47pm and many more such incidents within the last two weeks. I called up a friend and the call lasted for 1:47. Some one opens up some convocation pdf on my compu and it says 47th convocation(will post more of these – not in a mood right now).

z=26 , u=21 –> z + u =47
I randomly see out of the auto after waking up randomly because of the bad roads and there i see a number plate and it read 47**
Today(23rd May, 2009) while chatting with a school friend was reminded of the fact that my 10th standard roll number was 47.
My jee rank = 3125 –> 3+1=4 and 2+5=7 Fucking 47 again!

It feels as if there is some force trying to tell me something, asking me to solve this puzzle this mystery and I do not know what it will lead to but only clue I have is the number 47! But what could 47 possibly denote if it is to speak about something. 47 days remaining in my life? or will i die at 47 years of age! Something 47 days hence or some date’s numbers add up to something and that will be the end of this world and like I can do something about it? I mean for God’s sake initially i was finding it fascinating but now enough of it lately…phew!! SOS!

Top 11 Aamir Khan movies!

Pure awesomeness! I generally am not a big movie freak but when it comes to discussion I have my small list. Anyways, thinking of some of the best movies I have seen, most are of AK. The list:

11. Mann (1999)
10. Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak (1988)
9. Hum Hain Rahi Pyar Ke (1993)
8. Sarfarosh (1999)
7. Lagaan: Once Upon a Time in India (2001)
6. Taare Zameen Par (2007)
5. Dil Hai Ki Manta Nahin (1991) – awesome character
4. Rang De Basanti (2006)
3. Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikandar (1992)
2. Dil Chahta Hai (2001)
1. Andaz Apna Apna (1994) – unparalleled

There was a small edit in the list. I watched Sarfarosh and some others again and realized what people commented in here. Sarfarosh was hence moved to 8th position.

Simply great movies. Some the initial ones are undoubtedly well placed. Your views might differ with the middle order. I would love your comments! :

Blank paper! Amazing you!

Great exercise for one and all! Follow it as I write, might sound foolish but just do it.
So we start by lying down….Lie down absolutely anywhere but sufficient place needed. Then you stretch out your arms wide open and legs too in a relaxed way. Then with your eyes shut try to forget about various parts and this is the most difficult part but you will know what to do when you do it and except your mind; obviously you use your brain to forget!

Once you think you are into this with deep breathing though not necessary as this might also act as a disturbance. Note: This is no YOGA! Continuing…You are 5 minutes into this exercise/act and all you have is your mind. Now sit in a roller-coaster-safari-ride where you are alone in the car with ups and downs, turns and twists. Try to concentrate on yourself as the third person and ride is getting dangerous with more and more steep turns. Then try to immediately think of absolutely anything related to you or not related, what you want or do not want, any word that comes to your mind. While thinking have a pen and a blank paper big enough in your hand; your eyes are still closed.

It might be an awkward position to write in but its just fine; you still do not have your other parts; but your hands moving and you just write whatever comes to your mind; think in the most weirdest way; rather do not think about your life’s positioning but think about anything, and be honest to write what you think, however on the page; complete sentence, broken lines, words, pictures, a story, banana, black, songs, great things, sadness, a beggar along the roadside naked and shivering, you almost about to get drowned, you with aamir khan having dinner, dogs, cats, music, girls, beer, how you cracked jee, aoe, snakes, dinosaurs,etc……just let it go on. Do it till you want to, and you can in between be seated so that you can write well but remember your eyes must be closed, see for yourself how amazing you are! How well you think! How great our mind is!

A montage!

PS: Do post a snapshot of your blank papers somewhere! Life is….

Wannabee #2

The second one Quite interesting.

█╬█╬█╬█

╬█╬█╬█╬█╬█╬█╬█╬█╬█╬█
•๑۩๑•══════•๑۩๑••๑۩๑•══════•๑۩๑•
ω.з.ℓ.c.o.m.з … т.o. … m.y. …р.я.o.f.ı.l.з
•๑۩๑•══════•๑۩๑••๑۩๑•══════•๑۩๑•
•๋●Ҳ̸●•๋●Ҳ̸●•๋●Ҳ̸●ฬคภภค кภ๏ฬ ๓є•๋●Ҳ̸●•๋●Ҳ̸●•๋●Ҳ̸●
MY ATTITUDE TELLS ME THAT……..
1.Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
2.It’s good to be clever, but not to show it.
3.A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.
4.I have learned to use the word impossible with the greatest caution.
5.I do not think that winning is the most important thing. I think winning is the only thing.
6.Attitude also warned me-” Sacrifice your time for people to
know you “.
7.In your life, problems may start from Haywards 2000 or Haywards 5000, but you must take it as a Royal Challenge. Otherwise people will call you Old Monk & stick a Black Label on you. But you must fight like Napoleon, live like Bagpiper, walk like Johny Walker, work till 8 PM & think like Directors Special, then your life will be Imperial Blue. If you do all the things, you’ll be an Aristocrat & there will be good value for your Signature’s.!
∂αиgєя:-σтнєя ρєσρℓє мαу нαявσя нι∂∂єи gяυ∂gєร αи∂ яєรєитмєитร вє¢αυรє σƒ му ¢σℓ∂иєรร αи∂ яєรєяνє. รє¢яєтร ƒяσм тнє ραรт αяє σƒтєи υรє∂ αgαιиรт мє.
░★●۩¤¦ ̲̅T̲̅H̲̅E̲̅ ̲̅L̲̅E̲̅G̲̅E̲̅N̲̅D̲̅ ̲̅N̲̅E̲̅V̲̅E̲̅R̲̅ ̲̅D̲̅I̲̅E̲̅S̲̅ ¦¤۩●★░

█║▌│█│║▌║││█║▌│║▌║
9 8 6 0 3 4 4 5 0 5
© PROFILE ORIGINAL ®
© αℓℓ яιgнтѕ яєѕєяνє∂..™

▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █

Is it diwali? Will we not want to read this amazing write-up even if he did not welcome us? Whats the language used? What the barcode doing there if its a barcode? Yeah sure this profile is original. Are there people who would sued on copying this marvelous orkut profile, oh err, i forgot there are other wannabees! Surely this will be most probably copied. Who is the legend? Who has tasted all brands? Who is mostly steve jobs or bill gates? Who is dangerous? Who is not a fool? Who is he?

Wannabees #1

Some findings from the internet. Inspired from rahul dash’s blog, I went on in a search of internet newbies/wannabees. Everyone is an spirant and hence everyone’s a wannabee but some have been the elitist in this community. No more words for them>> just some encounters The first one…

I dΘηт αяgμє I jμšт яμlє! I dΘηт ƒΘllΘш тнє яμlєš,I jμšт мαkє тнє яμlєš! I тєℓℓ Θтнєяš шнαт тΘ dΘ,ηΘвΘ∂y тєℓℓš MEH шнαт тнє нєll m šμρρΘšє∂ тΘ dΘ !!

му яυℓєz…

яυℓє ησ 1: ι αм αℓωαуz яут.
яυℓє ησ 2: ιƒ ι αм ωяσηg…ѕєє яυℓє # 1

||šτθρ ταlκιπg ||
||šταгτ гθcκιπg||

Most of them cannot type readable English. Generally its is a mix of greek, german, alienist(marcist or neptunist), japanese and barbarian characters and symbols which will take hours to write in and days to understand by the not-like-them-crowd.

One thing common in this breed of people is that they think their this way of writing is cool and portrays they are just great, they are the napolean, shahrukh khan and angelina jolie at the same time…etc.. and the opposite sex will fall for them and thats true – “Every wannabee eventually meets other equally alike wannabee opposite sex counterparts and will have kids together!” huh…sorry if that hurt, are you a wannabee?